Comedy Central: Miller is lone survivor of 'mama grizzly attacks'

This isn't exactly election news, but it's worth passing along anyway. Comedy Central's INdecision Forever has posted a satirical news item equating Sarah Palin's endorsement spree in mid-term elections across the country to a grizzly bear rampage, by mashing up reports of how her choices are faring with reports of the bear attack that occurred recently near Yellowstone National Park. After Palin-endorsee Karen Handel's "[electorially lifeless] body" was found in the Georgia GOP gubernatorial primary, Comedy Central "reports" a fictional wildlife spokesman's comments on the urgency his agency feels now, "This is the fifth victim within a month, all [endorsed] by the same bear. We are stepping up our efforts to capture this grizzly." The report had this to say about Joe Miller, a Fairbanks attorney whose race for the Republican nomination for U.S. Senate against incumbent Sen. Lisa Murkowski has also been endorsed by Palin: "The only known surviving victim, [Joe Miller of Fairbanks, Alaska], has been hospitalized with similar injuries in Cody, Wyoming." The piece closes with a great deal of comment from "Miller" about his mauling via hospital-bed appearances on network morning shows:

[Miller] said he woke up just before the bear came at him [with campaign funding and an endorsement].

"I screamed, she bit harder, I screamed harder, she continued to bite," he said, adding that he could hear his [voting bloc] breaking. "I told myself, play dead," he said. "I went totally limp. As soon as I went limp, I could feel her jaws get loose and then she let me go."

[Miller] said the grizzly [Palin] was silent.

"This, to me, was just an absolutely freaky thing," he said. "I have to believe that the bear was not normal. It was very quiet, it never made any noise. I felt like she was hunting me, like [she wanted me to be another carcass in her pile of endorsements]."