Will Alaska's U.S. Senate race get hairy?
Scott Woodham |
Sep 03, 2010
TO: The Scott McAdams for U.S. Senate campaign
SUBJECT: Whiskers
Dear Campaign Advisers, We read recently that at least two members of U.S. Sen. Mark Begich's staff have gone to Alaska to assist with the effort on behalf of your candidate, and by now operatives from the national Democratic Party are probably on their way or already helping. That's no big deal to us; this race promises to be hard-fought on both sides, so it makes sense to send reinforcements. But we're very concerned Mr. McAdams is getting bad D.C.-based style advice and that it could start off his campaign at a disadvantage. We don't know if it's because the folks helping out have spent too much time in D.C., but it looks like McAdams has been under pressure to tidy up his appearance. He seems to have shaved his chin whiskers this week, leaving only a moustache. And in a recent interview on the Rachel Maddow Show, he was seen wearing a suit and tie to the Alaska State Fair in Palmer. A suit and tie? At the fair? What if dipping sauce drips from a freshly fried Alaska Grown peanut potato?! The way Southcentral's weather has been lately, a Mustang suit or cannery tux would probably have been more appropriate, but an Outside audience would really have been confused by that. To be fair, his attire was probably a token of respect. It was your candidate's first national television appearance, after all.
And more importantly, he didn't look comfortable at all. Frankly, we The Concerned don't blame him; we blame his get-up. We The Concerned -- the vast majority of us anyway -- were brought up to think of neckties (and high heels for that matter) as little more than ostentatious safety hazards. McAdams didn't look like he was standing very close to the gears of any midway rides, but we think he was right to be wary. If his necktie got caught in one of those things, he could be in real danger -- especially if, as we suspect, you also encouraged him to leave his pocketknife at home. But maybe the appearance with Rachel Maddow didn't do much damage to your candidate's moderate cred. After all, the way your candidate's opponent has been talking about the modern U.S. Constitution and certain beloved federal programs, it's not hard for McAdams to look moderate. But still, that doesn't mean he needs to forget where he comes from. All wardrobe aside, the facial hair thing is probably causing us the greatest concern on behalf of your candidate. While it's unfortunate he lost the chin pelt, at least he kept the 'stache. And just in case any of you are thinking of advising him to shave it off, a nude upper lip would be a mistake.
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And incidentally, whose idea was it to have him have him 










